Your experience is unique to you. No two people are looking through the same pair of eyes or feeling with the same heart. No-one else’s story is your story. So listen to others with compassion but with non-attachment. You will hear many stories about pregnancy and childbirth; hear much advice about the best way to do this or that; be inundated with the latest “must-haves” for your baby. At times this information can feel overwhelming. Social media and the internet can be both an advantage and a disadvantage as you find goods, services and answers at your fingertips in the blink of an eye.
I often talk to my clients about “decluttering”… About peeling back the layers to think about what you really would like, what you really need. Honestly, all the baby needs is skin to skin contact and milk from its mother… So perhaps prioritising the essentials and talking openly with your partner of family about what YOU might need could help you enormously in the months to come.
But know this – YOU CREATE YOUR REALITY. You can choose how you feel about this pregnancy. You can choose how you feel about giving birth. You can choose how you feel about the prospect of motherhood. By all means, keep informed and listen to medical advice about staying healthy for you and your baby. Jot down your ideas in a journal or a scrap book… your hopes, fears, baby names, to-do lists, new contacts, everything. Use your journal as a mirror so you can see the journey you have travelled. What a gift to be able to share with your child when he or she is older… This journal is what will lead you back to the REAL you when or if you lose your way. To be honest, when I was pregnant I didn’t realise I had a choice about how I felt and what I thought. I understand now that this chasm between the REAL me and the pregnant me was possibly what lead to post-natal depression.
Probably, like you, I fell pregnant when I was working full time in a pressurised environment, and, like you, I read up on everything I could find about bumps, births and babies. I was excited – and secretly looking forward to what I thought would be a bit of a holiday during my maternity leave… I imagined sunny days, picnicking in the park, cuddles and powdery bath-times, nursery rhymes and daytime naps. Imagine my surprise, as someone who is organised and generally in control, when I found myself suffering from the “baby blues”. The guilt, anger and anxiety, combined with sleep deprivation, were overwhelming. Why had this happened? I thought I had ticked all the boxes; covered all bases – done the yoga, Pilates, swimming, NCT classes…
What I realise now, with hindsight, is that no-one had told me to prepare my inner game, my mind-set. I was totally mentally, emotionally and spiritually unprepared for the transformation that was about to happen, along with the conflicting and intense emotions that brings.
So, after many years of soul searching, I am here. I have written this program, Birthing Beautiful Souls – Mastering your Mind-set in Pregnancy, so that you can be guided, before the birth of your baby, your beautiful soul, to prepare you – mentally, emotionally and spiritually – so that you are empowered, resilient and confident. So that you make choices that suit you. So that you create your reality. So that you connect and bond with your baby before birth, giving you both the best start in your new life together. Having a positive outlook simply means you have chosen to feel good. I have created this program to enable you to close the gap between what you know intellectually and physically and how you feel emotionally and spiritually, so that you never lose sight of the REAL you!